Sam frowned, wondering how his aging looked like from Raphael's perspective. Remembered not that long ago when he had looked at pictures of himself when he was younger. It felt like a long time ago. "A lot has happened. Maybe I wanted you to pop up again because it'd be a lot better than what we usually deal with these days."
Life had been tough. They were weary of it these days, all of them. They wouldn't, couldn't stop, of course. But they had become numb to a lot. Cynical in a way Sam hadn't used to be. "I had that dream and then I wanted to know for sure. Especially after what happened with Castiel and Metatron."
Wait, he supposed he had to explain. "Metatron used a fake you to try and get Castiel to lead Heaven."
"Metatron? That old hack. I thought they fired him. I never liked him, he was a bit of a slimeball. I bet he did an okay job writing me but he was bad at finer details." He couldn't see Metatron being able to pull of complexity, he always struggled in that area. He'd read his work - it wasn't awful but flaws were there.
"I've been with Sir since ... it's been long." Raphael laughed sadly and awkwardly squirmed on the bench, not realising he had called Lazar sir and not by name. It was so beaten into him, he barely noticed. Then it occurred to him and he went rigid, realising. "Oh shit, I'm asleep again."
"That's fine. He doesn't have to know." Sam reached out to put an arm around Raphael, unsure how to best handle it. The fear was palpable, it was as if he felt it himself. Maybe he did, being in Raphael's dream. Or sharing a dream. He wasn't sure what exactly was happening ehre, metaphysically. "He's not here. It's just you and me."
And perhaps, niggling at the back of his head, someone else. Someone he tried to push out as much as he possibly could. "You wore a leather jacket. When Metatron wrote you. Castiel told me that."
Raphael flinched against the arm and slid himself down the bench to try and avoid the contact. Touch was not something he wanted any more, it always led to pain. Nice touches swiftly turned to pinches, stabs and jabs. He crossed his arms and listened to Sam, just trying to focus on the fact that him sleeping was a betray or rebellion. He was just so tired.
"Hm. I don't own a leather jacket." He frowned and wondered if Metatron just felt he was hotter like that. "If there has to be fanfic about me, I like it be sexy so I'll take it."
"There's fanfic about me. Because of those Supernatural books. It's weird. There's even a musical adaptation." It was downright bizarre and often insulting. "I haven't looked into it much, but I bet you come up sometimes. I know there's books you appear in."
He remembered people talking about that. Honestly, he remembered way too much from those conventions they had come across over the years.
Sam had crossed his arms, making it clear he wouldn't try to touch Raphael again. "I was looking for you in case you were in trouble. We'll get out of there. You and me. Together."
"Sam?" Raphael looked at Sam and wondered if it was going to be smart to talk to him frankly or if he would just double down on the heroics as he often seemed to. "Don't play hero and leave me out of it. I'm-- it's over."
Raphael gave him a half smile and then looked back at the shitty Eiffel tower. "I'm going to die here."
"I won't let you," Sam said, determined. Playing hero, of course. He wished he had a solid plan already, but so far he didn't know enough. But he had Matty as his brother, a father figure that had sold his soul to the King of Hell for him before, an angel who kept doing things no one else would ever dare and the devil himself in the back of his head.
He knew he'd find a way, much as things sucked right now. "I know you can't hope. But you can't make me stop hoping for us."
"Good luck." He gave Sam maybe a month before hope would start to dwindle but that was fine. Lazar had time. Sam was never leaving, he would die here with Raphie. And he didn't feel good about that. He truly hoped that there was a miracle. For Sam. Not for himself, he didn't think it was going to happen. "I'm rooting for you."
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waywarddone2024-09-20 07:08 pm
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Life had been tough. They were weary of it these days, all of them. They wouldn't, couldn't stop, of course. But they had become numb to a lot. Cynical in a way Sam hadn't used to be. "I had that dream and then I wanted to know for sure. Especially after what happened with Castiel and Metatron."
Wait, he supposed he had to explain. "Metatron used a fake you to try and get Castiel to lead Heaven."
no subject
"I've been with Sir since ... it's been long." Raphael laughed sadly and awkwardly squirmed on the bench, not realising he had called Lazar sir and not by name. It was so beaten into him, he barely noticed. Then it occurred to him and he went rigid, realising. "Oh shit, I'm asleep again."
no subject
And perhaps, niggling at the back of his head, someone else. Someone he tried to push out as much as he possibly could. "You wore a leather jacket. When Metatron wrote you. Castiel told me that."
no subject
"Hm. I don't own a leather jacket." He frowned and wondered if Metatron just felt he was hotter like that. "If there has to be fanfic about me, I like it be sexy so I'll take it."
no subject
He remembered people talking about that. Honestly, he remembered way too much from those conventions they had come across over the years.
Sam had crossed his arms, making it clear he wouldn't try to touch Raphael again. "I was looking for you in case you were in trouble. We'll get out of there. You and me. Together."
no subject
Raphael gave him a half smile and then looked back at the shitty Eiffel tower. "I'm going to die here."
no subject
He knew he'd find a way, much as things sucked right now. "I know you can't hope. But you can't make me stop hoping for us."
no subject